Yunnan - Land of eternal Spring

Jeremy and I have really enjoyed being lazy bums the last few days. We are staying in our friend Jo's guesthouse " Dragonfly Garden" which is located in this idyllic ancient Bai village in the southern part of Yunnan province. Jo is in the process of setting it up with her boyfriend Brian and they have adopted Dutch juggler, a Japanese diablo thrower, and Irish sound engineer, a puppy called Tara and a tortoise which they have lost. It has been fun hanging out in this very eccentric commune. The first thing we wake to in the morning is the cockadoodledoo of a giant black cock which wanders around the guesthouse sporadically humping all the little hens that follow it around. Today Jeremy and I have been down to the lake fishing with a Bai fisherman who catches his fish in what seems like a genius if some what cruel method. The fisherman owns a flock of birds called " Camerons". These birds are acceptionally good at catching fish, but unfortunately for them - they rarely get to consume their catch as these cunning little fishermen bind their necks so that they are incapable of swallowing the fish. In a choking state the deluded Cameron will cough and squeal until it's hero ( the fisherman) comes to the rescue, pulls it up onto the boat and opens it's mouth so it can then vomit and expel the fish that the fisherman will later sell at the market. It was an interesting is somewhat disturbing thing to watch - but later forgotten as we munched on delicious fish and beer with the Bai fisherman, his wife and two daughters.
Dali is bringing lots of new cool experiences and my legs are in utopia for not having to cycle 90 km a day. Jeremy on the other hand is having sniper withdrawels and has thus taken himself off on a three day adventure mission around the lake- probably to regain a sence of masculinity and to indulge in the freedom of not having to turn round whilst riding his bicycle to check that his blonde dred locked wife with a terrible sense of direction is still frantically pedalling behind him. Bliss. We are both in bliss. Me with my cold beer- painting a picture of the Egyptian goddess Isis on the wall in Jo's hostel and sporadically getting taught cool juggling tricks by Stan the juggler and Jeremy whizzing around the lake cleansing his stuffed brain from futile, female analytical facts.

Lovely lady lumps

Can you imagine what it is like to look like this day in, day out? Every day we wear the same smelly outfit. Skin tite black cycling shorts with padding in the bottom which all the little Chinese people observe curiously. A cycling helmet which barely fits over my mass of giant dred locks. Black sporty shades that frequently allow giant earth chunks to enter my eyes and lets not forget those padded cyclists gloves. I am the epitomy of one of those deluded chubby women that swan around the gym wearing all the garb. Thank goodness for my sarong which I wrap around me at every break - before the Chinese men have a chance to poke my lovely lady lumps.

Pagodas

Something which Jeremy and I have both taken a real liking to is the Chinese Pagoda. We even spent one night with a lovely Chinese family who allowed us to pitch up our tent underneath the pagoda in their garden to avoid the snakes. We like the pagoda so much that when we finally set up our business we have decided to name it the "Pagoda Garden."

Beautiful gorges

Even though I moan about my sore bottom, headless chickens, smelly bee infested toilets. When we cycle through misty mornings and finally come across visions like this and stop for our mid morning nescafe break - somehow all my worries seem to drift away and I begin to realise why I am doing this trip and really what it is all about.

Home...I want to go home Scarecrow

Can you imagine what it is like trying to read a Chinese map where everything is in Kanji? Jeremy and I spend hours perched on the side of the road trying to match up the funny little pictures on the road signs with ones on our gigantic map- God knows if we are even going in the right direction? This was the first sign with romanji writing that gave me some hope that one ay we shall return to England.

Sexy head torches and sniper marine tactics

There he is Mr. Jeremy Henrichs just bumbling along another bumpy road. Minutes later we took another of our many bottom rest stops.

This is how Jeremy and I look when we spend our evenings camping in the tent trying to hide from communist police men. For some reason mine always moves round and points up into the sky like some kind of laser beam. I have learnt from jeremy that this is not a good sniper, tactic for avoiding contact with the enemy.

Chicken Head Soup

This chicken head was a delicious and delightful surprise that jeremy found in his soup! We have since become vegetarians and are living on a staple diet of "mefan" - rice. It is the only word that we seem to be able to remeber in mandarin. Poor Jeremy is losing weight by the day and I cannot stop inspecting my rear end in the mirror to see if it looks any smaller.

Mr. Bu - the Chinese ghost

Jeremy and I are convinced that we have a Chinese ghost following us around. It seems that he is a bit of a trickster and is entertaining himself with playing lots of pranks on us. We have taken the pleasure of naming him 'Mr. Bu.' Our first experience of Mr.Bu was our second night on the road. Jeremy and I had experienced an exhausting day pedalling through the mud and rain and decided to shelter for the night in what seemed like a disused warehouse because we could not find a hotel. As we clambered over giant black tyres, we cringed at every sound that our tiptoes made - knowing that if we were to get caught tresspassing there could be very serious consequences in this communist country. After showering under a drainpipe and feeling safe with my longjons on - i sat inside our tent whilst Jeremy kept guard and prayed that no-one would find us and push us back out into the pouring rain. As I scrambled for our warm beers - the sacred ritual which we pedal towards all day- to my horror a bright flashing light pieced through the tent - a gang of policemen on the attack? I suddenley heard Jeremy run back and shout " What are you doing?" Confused and frightened I poked my head out of the tent waiting to be arrested only to see that my bicycles head light was manicly flashing on and off..on and off...on and off. I didn't even know that it had that function. After Jeremy had turned the light off and massively relieved - we went to sleep - if only for a few minutes at a time with us both waking up at the sound of every crack.
Our second experience of Mr. Bu was on another camping night. Jeremy and I had decided to pitch our tent in the middle of some farm land - hidden up on the side of some very long road. Wading through the long grasses with our bags - I cringed at the thought of how many snakes lived in this warm lush habitat. After a long exhausting day Jeremy and I drank our warm beers and fell sound asleep. In the middle of the night, I was awoken by a piercing bright light again shining in my face. Once my eyes had had time to adjust I realised it was my husband peering over me wearing his head torch. Before I had had a chance to open my mouth and ask him what he was doing- he had gestured with his hand for me to to be quiet whilst hushing me up. God - what now? - I thought. Then to my horror I realised that my inflatable mattress had something moving underneath it - but not only moving- it was pushing me and the entire bed up with it. It was as if Chinese aliens were coming to grab us from out of the earth- Giant snakes perhaps?. Jeremy pulled me off the bed and out of the safety of my pink silk camper sheet and screamed at me to get out of the tent. In tears I clambered out - not knowing what was going to await me outside and not been able to see because my eyes had still not had time to adjust. Minutes later I looked inside the tent to see Jeremy inspecting my air mattress. We thought that perhaps the creature was living inside it - perhaps it was Mr. Bu? Perhaps it was a giant air bubble? Whatever it may have been - we have since discarded the mattress and bought me a new one without any air.
Our third expreince of Mr. Bu was only two days ago when Jeremy and I had returned from our relaxing hot spa to the hotel room. As usual Jeremy would get down to his bike maintenance session whilst i lay on the bed reading my book ( about another couple who are cycling around the world) the women annoyingly seems to complain far less about everything than I do! I enjoy reminding Jeremy how well I am doing at everything as this couple only ride 50 km a day and I have only just started and we are riding 80km!! In the midst of my prattle which I knew Jeremy was not really listening to he suddenley looked really confised and said 'Thats really odd" ... " someone has completely rewired the bike and has wrapped my brake cable around the speedometer" " Crikey" I replied pretending that I understood what he was talking about... but then Jeremy said " If I had not seen this I could have had a really serious accident"... Someone had totally dislodged Jeremy's brakes... SPOOOKY!!! MR.. BU was it you - can you tackle the marine sniper and win over his beautiful bride?? Mr. Bu when will you strike again?

Jeremy has fixed my blog..

Maybe this is presumptious of me - but if you have tried and have been unsuccessful at leaving a message on my blog - it is because it was on the wrong settings. It is now fixed - so please don't be deterred!!! Jeremy and I play "who is the most popular game?" and I am losing terribly!

Interesting facts about China..

Did you know that the most popular operation for women in China is to have the corners of their eyes slit so that they become more round and foreign looking? Did you know that Chinese men like to grow their finger nails long as a sign that they are of an upper class and do not have to do manual labour? Gurggling and flobbing a huge piece of yellow phlegm at the floor is totally acceptable - even in restaurants - although the Chinese governments are trying to crack down on this because of the spreading of bird flu disease. Did you know that Chinese dogs seem to resemble their owners? Ciggarettes are as expensive as hotel rooms? Jeremy currently has a rat sitting next to him as we sit in this internet room? There are no antiques left in this country as they have all been plundered through wars- so everything is a replica or a very expensive tourist attraction? The Chinese worship the earth worm and believe that a giant cock rules the world? I lay in bed all last night throwing up in a dust bin whilst Jeremy stroked my back and ran around the town trying to find me some clean drinking water? Chinese people are only supposed to have one child each and if they have any more that child is not suppported by the government or any of the medical systems? The first Chinese empress who happened to be a concubine of one of the former emperors had a passion for worms and decided to breed them which led to the huge success of silk trading throughout China. Chinese people believe that eating hot food is much better for the digestive system. If you ask a Chinese person what colour they are they say "yellow".

Wedding pics and fire dancing video

The wonderful Q Devine has now put some more wedding pics and the fire dance video up - take a peek... but let it down load first.
http://www.bumblingalong.com/wedding/wedding.htm

I'm turning into a man

There is a mad energy in this country- it is as if the Chinese can smell the money they are going to make in the future. Jeremy and I keep on cycling though entire towns which are deserted. They have been built in a European style in the hope that soon they will be filled with Chinese people who have money. Every inch that we cycle has some type of worker making bricks...tarmacking roads, machines and drills everywhere. It is hard to go to the toilet and retain some type of diginity because every time I leave the bee infested pit there are usually a crowd of kids laughing their heads off. This is a hard country to travel. I have experienced stares in previous countries I have travelled, but nothing to this degree. Every time Jeremy and I stop to buy a drink we are swarmed with at least 30 people from the village that fiddle with our bike gadgets, speedometers, my dred locks, especially Jeremy's arms - they have never seen hair like it!! We try to communicate the best we can with the little Chinese that we have learnt and when it is obvious that there is a block in our communication they scribble a load of kanji down onto paper hoping it may resolve the problem. I thought India was a crazy experience - but this is just madness... I love it - but it is tiring. If I have learnt anything so far from this trip it is never to stare at animals in a zoo. I feel so self-concious every time I walk infront of some little Chinese lady with my padded cycling shorts knowing that she is inspecting my strange European shaped bottom! We have been travelling now for two weeks through an extremely poor part of China- Jeremy and I have not yet met one other foreignor, I honestly don't think these people have ever seen foreignors before. The video camera is becoming very useful as a way of communicating with the locals - they find it hysterical when we take some footage of them and then play it back to them. It really is an amazing experience, but I am looking forward to afew weeks time when we shall be down in Dali with our friend Jo who has set up "Dragonfly guest house" where we shall chill out for a few weeks with a load of performers and jugglers. I know from my previous travels that when it is tough at the beginning you are so much more apreciative when it gets a bit easier. It has only been a few weeks but I am missing things from home, I am getting withdrawel symtoms from Gigi ( the little girl that I looked after for a year), I miss drinking water from the tap, red wine, girly chats -poor jeremy has been a saint constantly listening to my female analytical prattle!! It is time to start talking about facts and things. We are now going to cycle for another 10 days til we get to Dali - my legs hairs appear to be getting thicker which is odd - possibly all this cycling has created a testosterone rush throughout my body- lovely.

random pics

These children found it hysterical that there were foreigners in their village.They loved having their picture taken.

This was the cute little boy of the Pagoda family that let us camp at their place for a night.

Prayers hanging from the tree in Zhoungzhang, the Venice of China

Would you like turtle, rat or frog madam?

Jeremy and I have just spent an entire day in our hotel room whilst the rain pours outside. I think China is suffering from freak weather. This morning we bought ourselves a video camera and so have been in our room all day making our bike trip movie - which has been so much fun! There is something so wonderful about having nothing important to do...it makes me deliriously silly. It is such a liberating feeling after having had so much to do this last year. Tomorrow we are back on the bikes for another 5 days so we are relishing the laziness. Jeremy is now talking about speeding up our schedule so that we will get to Dali quicker and now wants to do 1oo - 120 km each day- help!! Tonight we have decided to go out onto the town and we even decided to try and dress up for the occasion. Jeremy dipped into his bag and decided to wear his cleanest T shirt that he has only worm three times and I am wearing my long jons under and dress with a grey raincoat. I can't wait to chose between frog, rat or turtle for my dinner- and then maybe some smelly bean curd for pudding. If we are lucky later..maybe we can have a game of phlegm hurling at other people which many of the Chinese seem to enjoy as a pass time. Off now to do a sun dance before dinner....

Sorry

SorryI accidentally erased my blog. Chinese compurters! I'll start again tomorrow.